Teach Me How to Be Loved

One foot onto the ice
I hold my breath
And try to believe
Can I look at you with different eyes?
Like the girl that I was, when I was 17

The fallen empires
The shattered glass
The wicked echos of my past
I’ve seen it all before, that’s why I’m asking

Will you still be here tomorrow
Or will you leave in the dead of the night?
So your waves don’t crash around me
I’m staying one step ahead of the tide
Will you leave me lost in my shadows
Or will you pull me into your light?
Teach me how to be loved
Teach me how to be loved

I got caught up in a daze
Of the wine and roses
Such a sweet escape
But I watched it all slip away
Like running water from my hands
Raining on this picture land

The fallen empires
The shattered glass
The wicked echos of my past
I’ve seen it all before, that’s why I’m asking

Will you still be here tomorrow
Or will you leave in the dead of the night?
So your waves don’t crash around me
I’m staying one step ahead of the tide
Will you leave me lost in my shadows
Or will you pull me into your light?
Teach me how to be loved

Can I give myself just one more second chance?
And put my trust in love
Please don’t hurt me
If I make myself like a feather in your hand
And put my trust in love
Please don’t hurt me

Will you still be here tomorrow
Or will you leave in the dead of the night?
So your waves don’t crash around me
I’m staying one step ahead of the tide
Will you leave me lost in my shadows
Or will you pull me into your light?
Teach me how to be loved
Teach me how to be loved

All boundaries are conventions

“So, here you are
too foreign for home
too foreign for here.
Never enough for both.”

Poem: Fragment from “Diaspora Blues” by Ijeoma Umebinyuo
from Questions for Ada (2015)

Sixsmith. I climb the steps of the Scott Monument every morning and all becomes clear. Wish I could make you see this brightness. Don’t worry, all is well. All is so perfectly, damnably well. I understand now that boundaries between noise and sound are conventions. All boundaries are conventions, waiting to be transcended. One may transcend any convention if only one can first conceive of doing so. Moments like this, I can feel your heart beating as clearly as I feel my own, and I know that separation is an illusion. My life extends far beyond the limitations of me.